Joseph and I

I have a friend at UI called… let’s just call him Ben. He came from a non BPK senior high. He’s very smart, just like Adi Citra in case he studied Economy. He had won a ( or some) medal on Economic Olympiad, it was silver or gold, I’m not sure. He knew more, a lot more than me or my peers, about Economy. And his math was exceptional, as long as there’s number or mathematical symbol, he can solve it. He has the wits, reputation, and bright future. Really sounds like Adi Citra.

Do I like him? or did I? No.

I hated him and his intelligence, but more than that I hated his tone when I asked him something. For me, he seemed so arrogant, how he acted and talked seemed like exhibiting his self perfection, underestimating my intelligence. I was struggling with my assignments, quizzes, and he told me: Life is all about choice. Nothing is wrong with that sentence, but can’t you say that another time, when I won’t look like a slacker and a lazy student who doesn’t deserve to graduate?  I’m a SMAK 1 student, ya know? It hurts my feelings when you insult my intelligence or my effort. And thus, I tried my best to avoid having conversation with him.

But it was in my daydream one day that I realized that this whole scenario is very similar to Joseph’s. You know Joseph? Son of Jacob? If you don’t, well, you can just look at my story and imagine it happened a long time ago (not really, read the Bible, please).

The more I put my mind into it, the more I realized that I have been behaving like Joseph’s brothers who plotted together to eliminate him. Ben is smart, diligent, and a bright future awaits him. He’s better than me, I must admit. My realization of that fact has simultaneously put envy into my mind, which is wrong. His excellence is not wrong, I’m the one found guilty. It’s quite funny that I behaved like the characters I’ve been told since childhood not to be and it’s also quite a slap on my face.

Thank you ,God, for reminding me, please change me! XO


Update (November 6th 2010)

At my university, I met many new persons. But some of them reminded me of the past.

There was this senior girl Ely who looked like someone special to me in the past, but as time went by, people changed, and we haven’t talk anymore to each other for a long time. So, she kinda gives me a blue every time I see her.

And I also found another girl called Sonia, who resembles Ferina and Emiriya in the same time. So, I always have a grin (more like a smirk) every time I see her.

And Mr. Hosten introduced me to a girl, who reminded me of myself in my past. But I believe she’s a lot better than me. I just gave her some of my stories (’cause what else can I give to a doctor-wanna-be? Biology lesson?!) to help her gaining confidence in entering UI. Let’s hope I did something useful.

I’m very exhausted with my role as a staff on an event, and if Obama is really coming to UI, I’m going to be more exhausted.

P.S: My English is really broken these days, so many grammatical error, so few vocab, wrong diction, somebody please help me!!!